Throw Momma From The Train

Okay, so you know how sometimes you watch a movie and it just sticks with you? Like, it's not necessarily a cinematic masterpiece or anything, but it’s got that weird charm, that dark humor that just works? Well, for me, one of those movies is definitely Throw Momma From The Train. Have you guys seen it? If not, buckle up, because it’s a wild ride.

It came out in the late 80s, you know, peak Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwarzenegger. And this one? It’s got DeVito directing and starring, which is always a good sign for… something. Maybe not always good good, but definitely interesting good. And Kristen! Oh my gosh, Kristen. She plays Momma. And let me tell you, she is something else.

So, the premise is this: Owen, played by Rob Reiner – wait, no, that’s the wrong movie. Owen is played by… checks notes… Danny DeVito. Yes, Danny DeVito is Owen. He’s a struggling writer. Like, really struggling. His manuscript? It’s been rejected more times than I’ve told my dad I’ll call him back. Probably a lot.

And his ex-wife? She’s gone and published a book. A book based on his ideas. His life. Can you even imagine? It’s like someone stealing your diary and turning it into a bestseller. The audacity!

So Owen, he’s stewing. He’s mad. He’s depressed. He’s practically a walking, talking existential crisis. And he’s got this neighbor, Larry, played by the one and only, Greg Kinnear. No, wait. That’s definitely the wrong movie. Larry is played by… oh, it’s Danny DeVito. No, no, Larry is played by Billy Crystal. Okay, I’m getting confused. Larry is played by… Mark Harmon. Sigh. Okay, let’s start over. Larry Donner is played by… the legendary, the incomparable… Danny DeVito. Nope! I’m wrong again. It’s Danny DeVito who plays Owen. Larry is played by Kirk Cameron? No, that’s not right either.

This is why I need coffee. Larry Donner is played by… deep breath… Billy Crystal! Yes! Finally. My brain is a sieve today, apparently. So, Billy Crystal is Larry. He’s a novelist. A moderately successful one, but he’s got his own problems. And he’s a total germaphobe. Like, seriously germaphobic. Wipes everything down. Wears gloves. It’s hilarious, honestly.

Now, Owen and Larry, they start talking. They meet at a writing class. And Owen, in his infinite despair, is just venting. He’s talking about how he wishes his ex-wife would just… disappear. You know, a little dramatic flair.

And Larry, he’s listening. And he’s also dealing with his own annoyance. His ex-wife's mother. Who is basically the devil in a floral muumuu. And her name? It’s Betty. Or is it… Agnes? No, it’s Momma. The movie title is a clue, people! Her name is just… Momma. Which is almost worse, right? It’s like a title of dread.

So, Owen is muttering about killing his ex-wife. And Larry is muttering about… well, about Momma. And then, the lightbulb moment. The terrible, wonderful, awful lightbulb moment. They decide to help each other out.

Larry suggests, "Hey, Owen. What if you… throw Momma from the train?"

And Owen, bless his little, misguided heart, is like, "Whoa. That’s… a lot. But… maybe?"

The idea is that Owen will kill Larry’s terrible mother-in-law, Momma. And in exchange, Larry will kill Owen’s ex-wife. It’s a murder-for-hire pact, basically. Except, you know, they’re doing it for each other. Because they’re neighbors. And they’re both miserable. It’s like the ultimate bad buddy movie.

And the best part? They’re both terrible at it. Absolutely, hilariously, spectacularly awful.

Owen’s plan to kill Momma? It’s just… amateur hour. He tries to push her off a moving train. Like the title suggests. And Momma? She’s like, "Oh, is this a new dance move?" She’s completely unfazed. She’s this force of nature. Honestly, Shelley Winters is just phenomenal. She is so utterly, delightfully awful. You can’t help but love to hate her.

And Larry trying to kill Owen’s ex-wife? He’s got this whole elaborate plan. He’s trying to make it look like an accident. But he keeps messing up. He’s so worried about germs, about leaving fingerprints, about… well, about everything. It’s a comedy of errors, for sure.

The movie is just full of these little moments. Like Owen trying to get Momma to walk out into traffic. And she’s just… not getting it. She’s so oblivious to the danger, or so stubbornly unoblivious, it’s hard to tell.

And Larry’s attempts? He tries to sabotage her car. He tries to poison her. It’s all very clumsy and over-the-top. You’re just sitting there, cringing and laughing. It’s that perfect kind of dark humor where you feel a little bad for laughing, but you can’t help yourself.

There’s this scene where Owen is supposed to be waiting for Momma to get off the train, and he’s supposed to push her. And he’s just… not there. He’s chickened out. And Momma, she gets off the train and she’s just wandering around, looking for a ride. And she ends up at Owen’s place. Because of course she does.

And Larry is trying to be stealthy, trying to sneak into Owen’s ex-wife’s house. And he keeps bumping into things. He’s a walking disaster. You just know it’s not going to end well for anyone involved.

The supporting cast is also pretty great. There’s this detective, played by Ray Walston. You know him from My Favorite Martian? He’s just trying to figure out what the heck is going on. And he’s getting more and more confused with every passing minute.

And Owen’s ex-wife, Beth. She’s just so… oblivious. She’s all wrapped up in her book deal, her fame. She doesn’t see the chaos brewing around her. Which, honestly, is probably for the best.

The whole thing is just a masterclass in escalating absurdity. It starts with these two guys who are just fed up with their lives and the people in them. And it spirals into this ridiculous, life-or-death (or attempted life-or-death) situation.

What I love about this movie is that it’s not afraid to be a little bit… unhinged. It doesn’t take itself too seriously. It’s like the filmmakers were sitting around, saying, "What’s the worst that could happen?" And then they went and put it on screen.

And Shelley Winters as Momma? She deserves an award just for that performance. She’s so… much. She’s loud, she’s opinionated, she’s just constantly a problem. And yet, there’s a weird affection there, too. Owen and Larry both clearly have history with her.

It’s funny, because at its core, it’s a story about desperation. About wanting to escape your circumstances. And about how sometimes, when you try to fix things, you just end up making them a whole lot worse.

You know, I think we can all relate to feeling like we’re stuck. Like our lives aren’t going the way we planned. And we have those moments where we fantasize about… drastic solutions.

This movie takes that fantasy and runs with it. It’s not a subtle film. It’s loud. It’s messy. It’s got a lot of jokes that land, even if they’re a little bit… dark.

And the ending! Oh, the ending. It’s not exactly a happy, tidy resolution. But it’s satisfying in its own twisted way. It leaves you thinking, "Well, that happened."

So, if you’re looking for something to watch that’s a little bit different, a little bit off-kilter, and guaranteed to make you laugh, even if you feel a tiny bit guilty about it, then definitely check out Throw Momma From The Train. It’s a gem. A weird, dark, hilarious gem. And honestly, it’s the perfect movie to watch with a friend, over a couple of cups of coffee. We can all commiserate about our own imaginary Mommas. Just, you know, no actual trains involved. Please.

Seriously though, if you haven’t seen it, do yourself a favor. It’s got that 80s vibe, that classic comedy feel, but with a wicked, twisted edge. It’s one of those movies that’s just plain fun to watch. It’s not trying to be anything it’s not. And that’s part of its charm, right? It’s just… throwing Momma from the train. And we’re all along for the ride.